Jake's Stuff

Where Is Everyone?

nobody@vox.com(Jake) — Thu, 20 Mar 2008 14:56:45 -0700

Ok people, nobody has posted any new blog entries since James did his about the Spiderwick movie. Now, I understand that Tiff has been moving, so Tiff, maybe you're busy. I can see whay you haven't posted lately, although we all would love to hear how things are going back East!

But anyway, everyone should get posting, or I'll have to assume you're all...well, you know...

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Funny Story by Jack Winter

nobody@vox.com(Jake) — Thu, 13 Mar 2008 15:45:29 -0700

I think this is hilarious, does anyone else think so?

How I Met My Wife

-Jack Winter/The New Yorker

It had been a rough day, so when I walked into the party I was very chalant, despite my efforts to appear gruntled and consolate.

I was furling my wieldy umbrella for the coat check when I saw her standing alone in a corner. She was a descript person, a woman in a state of total array. Her hair was kempt, her clothing shevelled, and she moved in a gainly way.

I wanted desperately to meet her, but I knew I'd have to make bones about it since I was travelling cognito. Beknownst to me, the hostess, whom I could see both hide and hair of, was very proper, so it would be skin off my nose if anything bad happened. And even though I had only swerving loyalty to her, my manners couldn't be peccable. Only toward and heard-of behavior would do.

Fortunately, the embarrassment that my maculate appearance might cause was evitable. There were two ways about it, but the chances that someone as flappable as I would be ept enough to become persona grata or a sung hero were slim. I was, after all, something to sneeze at, someone you could easily hold a candle to, someone who usually aroused bridled passion.

So I decided not to risk it. But then, all at once, for some apparent reason, she looked in my direction and smiled in a way that I could make heads or tails of.

I was plussed. It was concerting to see that she was communicado, and it nerved me that she was interested in a pareil like me, sight seen. Normally, I had a domitable spirit, but, being corrigible, I felt capacitated--as if this were something I was great shakes at--and forgot that I had succeeded in situations like this only a told number of times. So, after a terminable delay, I acted with mitigated gall and made my way through the ruly crowd with strong givings.

Nevertheless, since this was all new hat to me and I had no time to prepare a promptu speech, I was petuous. Wanting to make only called-for remarks, I started talking about the hors d'oeuvres, trying to abuse her of the notion that I was sipid, and perhaps even bunk a few myths about myself.

She responded well, and I was mayed that she considered me a savory character who was up to some good. She told me who she was. "What a perfect nomer," I said, advertently. The conversation become more and more choate, and we spoke at length to much avail. But I was defatigable, so I had to leave at a godly hour. I asked if she wanted to come with me. To my delight, she was committal. We left the party together and have been together ever since. I have given her my love, and she has requited it.

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What language would you like to learn?

nobody@vox.com(Jake) — Sat, 08 Mar 2008 18:25:45 -0800

Ok, here is a survey for everyone:

a. What foreign language(s) do you speak?

b. If you could learn to speak any language(s) in the world, which would it be?

My Answers:

a. I speak some German (I'm getting pretty rusty) and American Sign Language (which I'm studying now at BYU).

b. I would like to learn Spanish--I think that's my #1 choice.

Other languages I want to learn:

>Russian

>Italian

>Hebrew

>Arabic

>Basque

Honestly I would love to learn any language. I know, I'm a geek....

EVERYONE RESPOND!

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Why Most Men Are Republican

nobody@vox.com(Jake) — Mon, 25 Feb 2008 13:41:38 -0800

Republican

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Everyone make Chelsea your friend (or family)!

nobody@vox.com(Jake) — Thu, 21 Feb 2008 17:42:00 -0800

Chelsea can't hardly ever use VOX, so it's up to all y'all to make her your friend and or family, OK? She has some cool posts (including some awesome videos).

P.S. Isn't she beautiful? (See picture below) Who wouldn't want her as a friend or family? ;-)

Chels

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Exploding Whale

nobody@vox.com(Jake) — Sun, 10 Feb 2008 17:44:57 -0800

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National Anthem Disasters

nobody@vox.com(Jake) — Wed, 06 Feb 2008 23:49:57 -0800

What with the elections and all, I thought it would be nice to showcase our National Anthem. Get ready...

This guy is just singing his little heart out. For some reason the video cuts in and out, but watch till the end--it's worth it.

Wanna destroy our Nation? How about our Nation's song? Call Hillary--she'll be glad to! Wait till "rocket's red glare," but brace yourself...

And finally, my all-time favorite. It's a total train wreck and I just can't look away.

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THIS guy's a Christian? Oi, I've got a headache...

nobody@vox.com(Jake) — Wed, 06 Feb 2008 23:20:06 -0800

Gov. Mike Huckabee, self-proclaimed "Christian."

On "Super" Tuesday, I saw Mike Huckabee on the Glen n Beck Show. Glen asked the Governor why he has been attacking Mitt Romney so visciously on the campaign trail and not ever going after Senator McCain. McCain is, after all, the front-runner. Huckabee said what I've heard him say before: "Romney drew first blood, and I had to retaliate" (or something to that effect). Glenn, looking a bit surprised, then asked "So this is just about revenge? It's a blood-sport for you?" He then asked a couple more questions, so Huckabee didn't answer that question. Dang it! I really wanted to hear how Huckabee would respond.

Well, the fact of the matter is, it is all about revenge for Huckabee. That's been clear since about day one. His thinly-disguised attacks on Romney were just that--thinly disguised. For example, in the Iowa debate, Huckabee was asked about Mormonism. Feigning ignorance, he said "I really don't know much about it...Don't Mormons believe that Jesus and the devil are brothers?" Hmmm, innocent curiosity, or is this just another underhanded jab at Romney? I'll let you decide. Huckabee said it was innocent. Really, Huckabee? Really? And since when were political debates meant to be forums for discussing religious beliefs? Obviously Huckabee isn't against biting, scratching, and kicking below the waistline in this "blood-sport" of his. His back-room deal with McCain (which he initially denied vehemently) in West Virginia is another example of his rotten, do-whatever-it-takes-to-gain-a-little-ground philosophy.

"Romney drew first blood," huh? Huckabee, when you run as a self-proclaimed Christian (and a minister at that), trumping up your religious credentials, acting "holier-than-thou" all the time, you walk a fine line. Why would you set yourself up as a model of Christianity and then say something like "he drew first blood, so naturally I had to fight back." Oi...it makes me sick. I suppose Huckabee was reading the the part of the Bible that says "an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth." Hate to tell ya buddy, but Jesus said that that philosophy was wrong. Dead wrong. What about "pray for your enemies" or "love thy neighbor?" I guess Huckabee hasn't gotten that far in his Bible study.

In contrast, Romney's son was on the Sean Hannity show right after the West Virginia McCain/Huckabee fiasco. Sean asked Mitt's son (I think maybe his name was Tagg--maybe I dreamed that up), "How mad is your Dad about Huckabee and McCain's scheming in West Virginia?" Tagg (or whatever his name is) said, "You know, my Dad told me, 'That's politics. It's gonna happen, we just need to move on.'" This has been Romney's attitude from the start. Seems Mitt knows about turning the other cheek. The "Christian" Huckabee acts like he's never heard the phrase.

A lot of people out there (including Mr. Huckabee, I'm sure) say Mormon's aren't Christians. Well, Huckabee, if you're a Christian, I'm sure glad I ain't.

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Free Redbox Rental

nobody@vox.com(Jake) — Wed, 06 Feb 2008 13:47:40 -0800

Use this code to get a free night's rental at Redbox:

DVDONME

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President Hinckley Slide Show.

nobody@vox.com(Jake) — Tue, 29 Jan 2008 12:48:12 -0800

Hinckleys5

This is a great slide show put together by BYU to honor President Hinckley. Hit the forward button in the bottom right corner to scroll through the pictures.

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